Mid Aug 2011....

It's been a while. Let's see...

#1 - my car. So grateful to have a safe reliable vehicle to get me where I need to go.
#2 - my mother. For so many reasons, I am grateful for her every day.
#3 - my job. Learning new things, doing great at what I already have to do, the laughter, the fun, the perks, the hard work, the knowledge, everything.
#4 - MY HOUSE - oh man, my house is just the best. I couldn't ask for a better live-in landlord and situation.
#5 - My music - I just found a bunch of music from the past 15 years...unbelievably excited!!!
#6 - Yoga - just started taking classes last week and it's amazing. Just love it.
#7 - my iPhone. Couldn't get through a day without it.
#8 - Relaxation. Getting the time to relax doing whatever I want to do, is priceless.
#9 - my sister. I got a month with her this summer, I value our friendship and moments together almost more than anything.
#10 - being healthy. I'm working on eating better, quitting smoking and exercising. It feels so good. :)

Didn't stay as consistent as I planned...

I didn't stay as consistent as I thought I would, but I am working on it. Funny I can do a few nights in a week and then *wham* it's weeks before another one gets done.
I certainly have plenty to be grateful for lately. It seems like I start this too late and all I have enough energy to do is a quick list. So here it is.

I am grateful for....
...JoDee - she's the best friend/roomie a girl could ask for.
...my momma - I don't talk to her as much as I used to but when I do, it feels so great.
...my job - gotta love when your job is something you love more than anything.
...my friends down here - they really help a girl feel like she is home.
...my car - got it's brakes replaced and I feel like I am back on my safe travels.
...my ever-growing bank account - there are times it stays neutral but it's growing..slowly but surely.
...my health - I had a terrible terrible cold and it's almost gone...being healthy and energetic feels SO good.
...my friends back home - I haven't seen them in quite some time and I am looking forward to seeing them when I go home for xmas.
...my house - even though there is a loafer living in the library...it's not THAT bad.
...the weather - it's getting to be winter and it's nothing close to a winter back home. :)
...myself - I am happy and motivated to do what I do...and I am where I want to be and going to the places I want to go.


Aaaaand that's it.

Good night and happy dreams.
xoxoxo

Bloggity Blog...

Still reeling from the past week...
Quick listin' it tonight though. 

-watching a movie with my sick little JoDee...poor dear friend. I am grateful for her health that will be back to her shortly.

-my awesome job. It seriously rocks.

-my good great friends down here...they also seriously rock. My friend Andy helped me with my car and now I am driving safe again. Talk about being grateful...sheesh. 

-recently am appreciating this little bit of Idaho weather down here. Hey...I did say I was homesick. Certainly feels like home, so fixed that issue. :)

-I get to go home & see my family very very soon...oh I am so excited to spend some nice quality time with Emma, and Tiggs, and my momma, and my brother, and my sil, and the friends that I get to see. (Whoever they may be...)

-The music I get to listen to every day...sooooo good.

-I actually have to go back to my job. I really feel so blessed to have this job, this position in this specific department, to work with these people. It's a fun, great place and I am so in love with it. I learn so much every day, and it's just awesome. 

-My life down here has been on an upward progression, pretty much all of 2010. The past week feels like I had a significant increase in the level of awesomeness. Feel like it had a spike and might even out up there.  Every day...life is good...if not great. 

It's very funny to be in this mindset...good funny. Awesomely funny. Simply rad.

So that's it for today. 

Good night and happy dreams. 

xoxo 

What a week...

It's really late but I am determined to get better at posting this...

The past few days were incredible. Probably one of the best weekends I have had in a really long time. I feel like I'm back on the right track mentally, physically, emotionally, everything. I lost my focus for a while and didn't even realize it. I am reminded of more and more things I am grateful for every day and just feel...right.

Now...recently...like the past day or so...I feel like I had a revelation. I remembered when I moved here I told myself "I am moving to California to succeed in the career choice I know is meant for me. I am going to work, be married to my work, give 120% to it. No need to think about or focus on relationships, or even going out and "living the LA life". I LOVE living here, where I do, with the friends and places close to me. I can have just as much fun staying in my world as I could going out in Hollywood or wherever is "hoppin" that night. I don't have to get all extra dressed up and wear uncomfortable shoes. The atmosphere in the places I choose to go to are the ones I love and kinda remind of back home. Getting caught up in the lifestyle down here isn't really what I have to do. I can do the occasional big night out, but overall, I can live a simple life and keep my focus on my job, to keep moving up. To keep learning more and more and be the best at what I am doing.
So, that being said. (Long winded...I know) I kinda decided to be a little more selfish than I was before. I like to be by myself, and I get to do that a lot more in my new house. I come home from work, work out, hang out a bit with the Jodster, and then I'm alone. I love that too. The thought popped into my head that I should make some rings that are all based around the word ME and wear them on my ring finger. I can be married to me. I can be in a committed relationship with myself. I can actually fulfill everything I need to be happy without having a boyfriend. I mean, I won't be opposed to a date if a guy asked me out. (well...depending on the guy anyway). I'm not closing off my friends, or anything else that could come into my life. I am open to whatever awesomeness that wants to come in my life. But the past month has been a lot of realizing things for me and how I want to live my life so I am happy. ME. It all depends on ME. So that's how it's gonna roll...and damn...I feel great about it. I feel like I am kinda on a high...super weird but super rad.

This may or may not have the 10 things I am grateful for, but there really are a bunch of specific things I am grateful for that happened since my last blog. Way more than 10. I think in a way...how I was describing little pieces of my life and how I feel and all that...the point got out there. It's like...so many things just keep happening, all little yet huge...and yeah. It's pretty awesome. I thought about most of them when I wrote this, and I know more things are going to keep happening. I will have plenty to talk about...perhaps not in specifics, but me having a lot to talk about shouldn't be a surprise.
It is very late though, and I have a motivating week ahead.

Good night and happy dreams
xoxo.

Missed yesterday for good reason...

Well...I did miss one day of this nightly trend I am trying so hard to keep up...but all for good reason. It was my darling bff Jodee's birthday and we went to the Pirate Adventure. Think Medieval Times but piratey... :) It was a super great night...started with some Dom on the way down...a lil Bacardi with our dinner...pirate beads and bandanas...oh yes. Good time was had by all.

The things I am grateful haven't changed much, but tonight it's slightly futuristic..

Tomorrow is payday...oh yessss. Big thing to be grateful for. My wonderful, kick-ass job that pays me what I need to survive! Woot woot! Big things in store for me..the next few days especially!

Had a nice chat with my momma tonight...always great to hear her voice. Life is good for her and my sister, which is just so nice to know. Seems like most of my friends & family are doing great...enjoying life to it's limit. :) Found out my Bradley's dad's procedure went well, which is a huge relief. THAT is something to be seriously grateful for. 

Super day at work tomorrow...tanning afterwards...and then going to Hotel Cafe to see Alex, the lead singer of The Damnwells! They have been one of my favorites since I saw them open up for The Fray many many years ago. I am sooo looking forward to it, since I missed the show last week. Then Friday I am going to a show at Sunset Marquis - an acoustic set with honeyhoney (who opened up for Lifehouse - the show they dedicated a song to me at). There is also a newer artist named Gary Clark Jr who I am absolutely stoked to see. I watched a bunch of youtube videos of him today and he is an incredible guitar player...it's gonna be amazazing. Who knows what's in store for the rest of the night after that. Saturday is another tanning session...cuz after pics last night it is obvious I am due for some serious color in my skin. The vampire look doesn't work so well for me with this dark hair. At least in my mind...haha. I believe my friend Andy is going to come up and check out my car to see what repairs need to happen so it stays my trusty lil Pilot and keeps getting me where I need to go. Saturday night is comedy night with my Sarah girl...we have a great plan of research that needs to begin and we have to hit it hard! Going to be so much fun!! Sunday is another morning of Agape and then some cleaning, laundry and relaxing. Maybe I will even rent "Get Him To The Greek" so I can catch up with the humor that is quoted constantly from that movie. Throw in a Costco & grocery stop...pretty much doesn't get better than that for weekend plans. Maybe if I get a wild hair up my ***, maybe go see Jackass 3D. We'll see. Anywho...all in all...so much to look forward to in life...just the next 4 days alone are enough for this blog. The sun is supposed to come out again tomorrow too! 

Things are looking up for my future...every day I see more and more of what I want happening. Life is so good when you let it be...and by gosh...I let it. :)

Good night and happy dreams.

xoxo

Mid-October....

Well...today was definitely better than some of the days I had last week. Actually..today was just like another normal fantastic day. I can tell that last week was just an out-of-norm stage...won't dwell on it...they happen.
I do know that tonight, though, I have just as many things to be grateful for as I did yesterday. As I will tomorrow, and next week, and next month.
I do know that it is later than I intended to be awake, and I have a big day tomorrow. It is Jodee's birthday and we are going to the Pirate Adventure (pirate version of Medieval Times.) It's going to be so much freeekin' fun!! I can't be up too late writing this, but like I said, I am going to do my best at being consistent.


Quick gratefulness tonight...
I am grateful for...
My friends (new and old, the near and far), my family (each and every single one of them), my job, my coworkers, the career I continuously grow in, my home, my car, the sunshine that makes Cali Cali, being able to go to Agape, being able to drive a short (but not really) drive and be right at the ocean...to see the never-ending water...


Good night & happy dreams 
xoxo

Inconsistency...

I'll be the first to admit my inconsistency with this blog could be a small piece of the puzzle to why my funky mood took control the past week or so. Granted...female hormones could have allowed the bummed-out mood to overcome the natural happy-go-lucky self I tend to be. Either way...my angels have been hinting that I need to do this blog, every day, like I used to. Even if it's a quick, jot down 10 things real fast, or an unloading of everything kinda blog, I need to do it. 

So here it is. We'll see how this one ends up.

The things I am grateful for still are similar to what they were when I started this blog, a year ago. Funny to think I have been living here for over a year now. And to think of where I am, what I am doing, and the things that have come into my life (and left for that matter)...it's amazing. 

Honestly, first and foremost, I am grateful for myself. That might sound slightly egotistical, but not really. I am grateful that I found the career that makes me the happiest, and I worked and trusted it would happen for me. I went through great depression, having no money, no life, ups and downs, fear of failure, highs of hope, a roller coaster of everything for months. I didn't give up, even though I was close. I got the job I knew I was going to get, and every day I learn more and more and love what I do more and more. Not a single day goes by that I leave work feeling bad, stressed out or upset about my choice. The past week of feeling abnormally down, the only time I actually felt normal was when I was at my job. It's seriously one of the BEST things that has ever come into my life. I couldn't be more grateful for the position I have, the boss, the coworkers, the connections, the friends, everything that has come along through this job. Feeling the days get better and better just keeps happening, and I know it is just going to be a trend. Every day there...gets better and better.

(*In addition to the job, I have networked myself out as a babysitter and will start to fulfill that piece of me that has been missing...the children factor. I love kids too much to not have some interaction with them. I get to start babysitting very very soon and I am very very very excited about it!*)

Now, to go along with the job, there are so many people I am grateful for, as I could not have gotten there without them. I could have failed, or given up, but these people kept me going. My mother, without her love, her support, her faith in me, I wouldn't have been strong enough to make it. My brother Josh, his care and brotherly support. I couldn't have imagined my brother would have such a part of my life down here being so far away, but he has shown me a lot of strength with his own life and kept me pushing for positivity for the both of us. As well as his support for me achieving my dreams...means so much. 

I have so many friends down here that made my life so much more happier than I could have imagined. My old roommates (who, yes, I miss very much) - Reece, Katt, Jeff, Chelsea, Ben & Kameron...those friends made my home down here the best place I could be. I felt safe, happy, welcome...I was surrounding by genuine care mixed with family sarcasm. Being that my family is very sarcastic, it was the atmosphere that definitely helped my homesickness disappear. The extended group of friends, all the clan that used to gather at our house or Shawn & Patrick's house....those people made memories that I won't ever forget. (Thanks to a multitude of pictures being taken at almost every hang out.)

Now...moving out of that house pulled me out of the consistent routine I had in my life. The happy chaos of the house with the dogs and never being alone, that is something I will miss. I already miss it. The new peaceful atmosphere of my new house is something to get used to, and it's slowly but surely progressing into the exact thing I need. I am learning another new lesson (which I found out today, I make the lessons appear) and I am excited to experience and balance out my life in this new place. I get to live with the JoDee...who I have been grateful for in many of my blogs. She is one thing that will always be on my list of things I am grateful for. The most genuine, kind-hearted and wonderful friend anyone could ask for, and every day I am reminded of the reasons I am grateful for her being in my life. How awesome is it that we get to be roomies finally!?!? I knew when I came to visit her two summers ago that I would live in this room, in this house, and be her roommate. I knew it. As we get settled into this new experience of being roomies, getting a balance to our lives, with her love life..my whatever-it-is "love" life...our friends, our exercise, our happiness...life just gets better and better. 

Now, after going home around Labor Day, I realized a couple things. 

One: The friends I have back home are some of the best in the world, and I will forever be grateful and happy that we are friends. Even if contact is few and far between...we will always be friends. Traci Jean (my twin), RaeAnne (RaeRae), Erin (My RinnyRoo), Erica (my who-knows-maybe-one-day-be-my-SIL), my LaBrisha (Bri), Jina (Walk even though it's Copstead now), Bradley (oh my dear Bradley <3), Lacey (I'll take care of the Pilot), Tara Anne (my cousin who's like a sister), and all of my dear friends at KXLY...I got to spend at least a little time with you, and I am seriously so glad and grateful I did. 

Two: I might have 50+ friends back home that I care about and want to see, but there are a couple handfuls of friends that I can't go without seeing. I made an extreme effort to see everyone I possibly could while I was home for 6 days, and I got to see almost all of them.  I am so happy I got to see and spend time with the few that I did...and believe you me...I couldn't live without them. I am very sad I didn't see everyone, but what can you do? I hope they know that I love them just as much as I did 5 years ago...and always will. Hopefully next time I am home we can make something happen. 

To round up this blog, as it is late and I am trying to get on a schedule of going to bed early in the hopes of waking up early to get my work-out on...I am grateful for so many things in my life, as always. I am grateful for the new friends I have made here, the few lessons I unwillingly taught myself, the strength I am still learning with some situations, my sweet car that I love always and forever, my faith and knowledge that my career is growing and the dreams I had for my career WILL come true, my health, my energy, my happiness, my everything. Life as I know...consistently gets better. Even with downer days, I know they will pass. I know that even while they are present, the greatness is still working for me. Being grateful and appreciative of everything in my life works for me. Going to the Agape International Spiritual Center and hearing Rev. Michael Bernard Beckwith speak is seriously something that my soul tells me I need to do. That is one more thing I am so grateful for...living here allows me to attend the services and feel the energy and be rejuvenated back to my old self...words don't even express what the Rev. does for me. 

Last note - as I cannot go a day without thinking of her - my darling Emma Grace. I love that girl more than anything else and just looking at a photo or video of her makes my energy shift into happiness...even when I miss her greatly. She is such a ray of sunshine and I am so blessed to have her as my niece. I watch BeenerKeKe on youtube just to have the chuckle of knowing she is addicted to watching him. 

Alrighty, this blog ended up longer than I thought, but not as long as it could have been. Here is to a night of growing and getting back on track. Here is to a night of inconsistently being consistent. Good night and happy dreams. 

xoxo